Milestones, Marathons and Midlife

The word of the week is inchoation.

Feb 10 - Generalities

This week I've been feeling… awkward.

Not in terms of tripping over things or being generally klutzy, but rather in a personal and general sense.

Maybe it's just a midlife thing, or something else; I'm not sure. In this new year, I've been consciously redirecting my rather-busy-brain from ruminating about things over which I have no control and to instead focus on the good things that I can direct my energies into.

Life's a beach ...

Oddly, it's the small things that we tend to notice when we' re not trying to constantly redraw the big picture of our life or re-examine it through a microscope.

Do more and worry less; I think that's a good place to start each day from.

Feb 11 - Writing Marathon

My writing bonanza continues this week!

Having three days off in a row is a wonderful thing for my creative side. Today was the first of three consecutive days that I spent writing, spending at least 8 to 10 hours a day editing my novel.

It's a fantastic feeling to fully immerse yourself into one's own creative world and have nothing else on your mind all day long. Chapter after chapter spent by as it was edited, helpfully input by my mom who has volunteered her time as before to type my dictated words as I go along.

The method works wonderfully, freeing me to visualize what I need to in my head and the word simply appear on a computer. Having someone else as familiar as I am with my creative work is also hugely beneficial, as I can bounce ideas off them and we can reach a better understanding together of how the work can be improved.

Simplify.

At the end of this week's session, we made it almost halfway through the book in a solid pass - one of many, of course. My previous week saw us create over 30 pages of notes to help improve the book on the next few passes, as we look to tidy up plot threads and many other aspects of the novel to make it a beautifully cohesive whole for the reader.

I'm very excited to continue the pushing this process each week this spring until my third draft is complete!

Feb 12 - Comix?

This month I'm trying something new: digital comics.

There many popular digital comics applications and programs out there, which can make it a little hard to choose. I ended up picking the high-rated Comixology app, in the main because it has a fair few free comics on a regular basis. Not to mention things going on sale for very low prices, which I also like.

You'd think that I would've got into digital comics earlier, but truth be told, I don't really read or collect comics. Sad to say, I speed through when I read, generally not paying too much attention to all the gorgeous artwork in order to read the story in the word bubbles.

That is to say, I read my comics like I read my books. Which is admittedly a disservice to comics, as the whole point of the medium is the visuals that will convey the story as well as the words.

All the same, comics are wonderful in that you can find unusual stories that you wouldn't be able to find in the printed word alone. Such is the case with one of my purchases: Robotech - Voltron, which is a crossover story that is quite common in the comic book world. While I thought it had a less-than-promising start in the first issue, and I'm concerned that the stories a little thin, it looks like it's made by loving fans so I'm willing to follow it for a few issues to see where it goes.

Feb 13 - Back to the normal

It was a tad difficult easing back into reality today.

Spending the last three days living inside the world of my novel was very intense and rewarding. Climbing back out of that creative cubbyhole was a little difficult, but I had things to do today that could be put off any longer - boring things, to be sure, but still necessary for daily life.

It's thrilling to imagine myself writing for living, as it comes to me more naturally every time that I immerse myself in the art of the written word. Being able to create every day and earn a living at the same time would be a wonderful, almost unimaginably fantastic and financially fun thing to do.

Small steps to get there though, I know. Part of what I do now is researching the business side of things, getting my head around what needs to be done to give my creative work the boost it needs to reach an audience( or five! )around the world. As a famous inventor once said:

Right now in 2014, I'm sweating the hard work weekly to make good things happen!

And on a related note, for your amusement: "Let It Go" as sung by the cast of Star Trek First Contact - it's genius!

Feb 14 - Keyboard Lucky

After seven years, I've finally replaced my computer keyboard.

Actually, that's not true; I purchased a new keyboard and I'm still keeping the other one, which still works fine. Both are made by Logitech and both are wireless, which is essential as I don't like wires which restrict where I can sit in the room.

The problem is that my old keyboard, isn't backlit and it's difficult to see in the dark - doubly so when half of the keys have had their letters worn away.

It glows in the dark!

The new keyboard is a Logitech K800 and it's stunning! The keys are well-shaped, the backlighting is adjustable in its intensity and it has enough additional features that it's almost as useful as my previous keyboard. The battery life isn't as good though, as it uses a rechargeable battery that lasts only about a day compared to my trusty old Logitech LX710, which uses rechargeable AA's that last months.

All the same, it's wonderful to be able to type and see exactly what's under my fingers again. Even though I use DragonDictate to type longer entries of text, having a keyboard is still essential to the operation of my computer and to being a writer in general. I highly recommend the K800, when you can get on sale, as I did this week… 

It definitely makes me happy!

Feb 15 - Twice Thankful

Today marks two middling milestones for me.

The first is my one year anniversary at Staples. It's an important thing to me as I spent a year looking for a job before Staples finally took a chance on me; it was very wearing, as I'm sure regular readers of this blog noticed from my post during that difficult time. While my current job is still stressful some days and doesn't do much to reduce my bills overall, I've been very very fortunate when it comes to people I work with and to have a job in general which are not all that available here in Victoria, still.

The second milestone today was when this very blog logged its 20,000th hit!

On average, this blog gets almost 10 hits a day, which is decent considering it's just written for personal reasons and not commercial. Interestingly, if I'd decided way back in 2007 to monetize my blog using Google AdSense, I'd have earned an astonishing $23.00 a year - not really worth it, I think, to annoy people with ads.

I'm just happy that people are reading it on a regular basis, usually a dozen or two people from trackable sources a week, which is fine. It's up here to be read, by whoever wants to read it, with whatever I've decided is important to share that week.

See you after another 20,000 hits!

Feb 16 -Beep Boop Drip?

There was an update from the Tricorder Project today!

For those of you don't know, there's a extremely talented hardware enthusiast named Peter who back in 2012 decided to share with the world his dream to build an actual working Tricorder device. Ever since then, he's made remarkable progress in bringing his vision to life.

Currently, he's developed the Mark 5 Tricorder, which has an abundance of sensors and is extremely configurable - meaning people can add their own creations to his work. I think it's incredible to see how skillfully this extremely skilled person has progressed in his project. It's inspiring and quite simply the dazzles me with how much knowledge has been applied by one person to create such an intricate technical device that will benefit many people around the world.

I also know that I definitely want to purchase one if they ever become available.

On a work note: it's been getting better lately, in that I'm not feeling as stressed I have been previously, day-to-day. Prioritizing seems to be the key as well is planning ahead, so keeping on top of things means I have to be at 100% concentration all day long, which is rather wearing. However it does mean that by the end of the day I'm not a frazzled all of tense muscles waiting to crawl home at the end of my shift.

Unless the roof leaks at work during a heavy rainstorm. Again.

That happened today, with strong winds driving rain in sideways through a ventilation system that can't cope with that level of water. Meaning a lot of it worked its way down and into the store, soaking things that should not be exposed to water. Resulting in my getting home two hours later than planned, a little tired and a lot hungry but strangely not stressed; these sort of things don't really bother me anymore.

Which makes me smile, as I now tend to sweat the small things and not the big, in life.

Not much to add here; apart from writing and working, it's been a slow week and since I don't have much of an active social circle around these parts, there's been nothing going on in that area. However, I should have a lot more to say in that department next week; stay tuned!

Scars, Star Trek and Spirals

The word of the week is irascible.

Feb 3 – Slashed Hours

My three( or two )day work weeks begin now.

Leaving lots of time for writing and doing other things. Well, mainly writing. I've little interest at the moment in anything other than putting words together and finding a more fulfilling job – both monetarily and personally.

Meaning books, gaming, socializing and most other optional activities have gone by the wayside. Which is strange, as I used to enjoy the deep diversions that PC gaming or reading a story series gave me. Now, the more visceral visions of reality have sapped my desire to deviate daily and I sometimes find myself wondering when the last time was that I played / read one of my many, many PC games / books.

Maybe this summer; I’ve a lot to do until then.

This makes about as much sense as sidewalk cat today...

On a different note, I was lightly mauled( slightly savaged? )by a sidewalk cat today. I’d headed out in the afternoon, all chuffed for a relaxing tea and to prep for writing this week, when I encountered said cat as I’d done many times before. This time, for no reason, he decided my hand would make good practice for killing small animals; it was all over in a few seconds. I walked quickly to Moka House, where I washed and wrapped my shredded skin, then headed home – my hand felt oddly cold due to the copious amounts of blood I was losing, but a tentative examination after first aid showed no deep or major wounds.

Thankfully not all that deep, but definitely ouchy...

It was not a good start to the week and really threw off my night. I’ve no idea what set off the cat, even being a cat person, so all evening I wondered where I’d managed to tick off the universe. Obviously, I did little writing; I was neither capable of typing not desirous of attempting to do so, even by voice. 

Just… bummed out. By a random cat, no less!

Feb 4 - Novel progress!

Shaking off yesterday, I got to work writing today.

Reviewing notes, making more new notes, going over critique suggestions and corrections… a very good portion of today was productive and that made me quite happy. Being able to devote an entire day( one of three this week! ) to JUST working on my novel was fantastic and brought back the same feelings of creative progress as I had writing the novel’s first draft a year and a half ago.

It’s not all easy going, though. There was an accident some months ago with my notes, where salt chemicals were spilled all over the entire pile of papers, soaking through many pages. So whenever I handle them, I have to wear impermeable gloves, which really makes things awkward. Especially as I have to remember I can’t touch my face or rub my eyes when I'm tired.

But then, nothing worth doing is ever easy, right?

Feb 5 - Loneliness Is An Addiction

Why am I more observer than participant?

I’ve thought for a while that I may have some asocial tendencies, but lately I’ve wondered if there’s some other category I fall into – asocial people are indifferent to socializing in general and tend to be more monastic.

For me, I tend to spend a lot of time alone.

Whether that’s time alone in my head or in person, it amounts to the same thing. I’ve pondered if that, for me, it’s a combination of being ‘new’ in Victoria and being a writer, which tends to lead one to observe things happening rather than interact. When I was in Ontario, I was out with friends on a fairly regular basis, but even that changed fairly regularly over time: it went from boardgaming in high school to video games in university back to roleplaying and then… not much. 

The cycle of work, bar socials, repeat wore on me, I think, and helped spur my move to Victoria. Now that I’ve been here for over half a decade, I have a little perspective on things and can see that while I didn’t repeat the work / bar cycle by any means here, nothing has really taken its place.

Previously, I’ve mentioned that people need at least three spaces in their lives: work, home and somewhere that’s neither of those two things. For me, I’m distancing myself from work and there’s not much of a home life, being single… so that leaves the Somewhere Else still to be found. So far, I've not found coffee shops or park benches conducive to being able to relax and write, while pubs are definitely out too.

For some reason, the phrase ‘Loneliness is an Addiction’ popped into my head this week. I’m not sure why, but the connotations of that phrase are intriguing. Related to depression in general, one can easily wallow in the aspects of loneliness, something I’m familiar with from years past; it’s easy to do.

Fortunately, I’m neither depressed or overly lonely, but saying that doesn’t always keep the feelings at bay. For me, I’m caught between an unfulfilling present and an uncertain future which I’m making every effort to see as bright and attainable. It’s the equivalent of seeing the light at the end of the tunnel blinking at you in morse code, sending you a message you can’t quite decode...

For me, all I do then is close my eyes and keep walking forward, trying not to stumble.

Feb 6 - How NOT to do business

Tech support is a family sideline of mine.

For many years now, I’ve had my parent’s PC set up so that I could log in and deal with whatever minor emergency had cropped up that day. It was convenient and quite a lot easier than physically going over to their place at the drop of a hat, given that most ‘fixes’ were quite simple.

The software I’ve used to date is LogMeIn, which up until a week ago was free and worked very well. Yet all of a sudden, this year the company decided to abandon its lowest-tier customers with a mere week’s notice that they had to move on or buy an ‘introductory’ year-long subscription for a substantial cost.

When it comes down to it, I wouldn’t have minded paying SOME kind of fee, with a little notice. A week’s notice is not time enough to make an informed decision and so myself, along with thousands of others, were left adrift for our remote access needs.

Fortunately, there are a few other alternatives, albeit none of them working as well as LogMeIn or with as many features. I ended up installing the dully-named Remote Utilities, which is a free bit of kit and does all that I need. I imagine they’ll still be around in a few years and even if they decide to charge a fee at some point, I hope they’ll give a LOT more notice than their competitor LogMeIn did – there’s a lot of angry people out there, for no reason really, which I find amusing in an age where customers can form communities at the drop of a hat. 

LogMeIn is finding itself ending up on the short end of a large stick of negative opinion, which won’t help their company much.

If they’re remotely in tune with the community, they’ll find a way to regain our trust.

Feb 7 - Dang

My taxes aren’t going to be all that great this year. 

I was hoping that since I earned so little in 2013, that I'd get a decent return( ie. a couple of paycheque's worth )and my initial calculations showed this. However, plugging in the actual numbers this week resulted in a five-fold( yeah... )reduction in my return amount - but at least I'm getting a return, right?

 

Taxes are strange that way. Everyone feels as though they are entitled to getting money back, but few people understand the WHY of how the system works, even in general terms. Myself, I dealt with taxes peripherally for years and picked up quite a few tips, as well as doing my own family’s for the last decade… but I don’t consider myself all that knowledgable. 

Which is fine, as simple tax returns don’t need experts; if you’re rich and / or have a lot of business taxes to do, definitely get yourself help. In the main, people expect to get money back and when it doesn’t work out that way, frowns follow quickly.

Be grateful for the positive, don't spend your chickens before they hatch and all that. What I should be doing( instead of lamenting a loss of money that was never really there )is planning on what island I'll be buying for a writer's retreat once my books take off.

That's definitely positive thinking.

Feb 8 - Star Trek Continues!

The second episode of Star Trek Continues premiered tonight online – oh yeah!

For those who haven't yet seen the first episode, Pilgrim To Eternity, you can find it here – it’s incredible to see! Below is Episode 2: Lolani … 

Scoot, go watch them both and tell me what you think. I’ll tell you what I think:

I can’t wait for the third episode to show up!

Feb 9 - For a Laugh

Today, I really needed a laugh.

My bike tire went flat on the way to work; nothing new there. I took it across the lot to SportCheck to have the tube replaced and picked it up after work: all done, no biggie.

The tire went flat as I stepped out the door on my way home – again, nothing new there.

It was admittedly no fun walking home in the cold rain / wannabe-snow-droplets when I’d expected to be cozily eating dinner much sooner. It sparked a bit of a down spiral tonight, where I felt rather out of control of many things: my personal life, career, day job, writing aspirations, finances… you name it, my mind sounded off about it all being beyond my ability to have any control over it. All from a simple flat tire; the brain’s odd that way and usually I’m able to ignore such subconscious ramblings of mine.

Thing is, when they contain a fair amount of truth, it’s much, MUCH harder to ignore them.

After a late dinner and an even later chat with a great friend back in ON, I still hadn’t made a dent in my blog. The weather system moving in across lower BC here is a doozy,  making my head pound rather nastily to the point where I needed need some heavy-duty Tylenol to try and keep it from becoming a migraine. Which didn't work; as the heavy rains moved in, my head felt like bursting from the inside - not a pleasant sensation to deal with.

Needless to say, I wasn’t in a great mood tonight and so again, I needed a laugh. Which I found quite by accident in the artistic scribblings of a subway commuter:

That helped, letting me hoping the week to come will see a lot of progress with my novel!

It’s funny: reading my blog this week, it seems as though it was written by someone else. Someone with a more positive outlook on things, who doesn’t let life’s little( and large )bumps get them down. Which is amusing, as I’m obviously the author of both my blog and my own life, yet I am able to surprise myself when what I’ve created takes a totally different tack from how I’m feeling inside. Which I think is fantastic; who wouldn’t want a pick-me-up to arise from the words spilling out of their own mind?

PPS - the blog's done after finishing Monday morning, a little before noon. My head's still killing me, but I definitely felt better completing it in the AM than trying to struggle to a semi-conscious finish last night.